Cult Movie Cabal

Yep here we are with our movie award episode on the anniversary of our first show. listen up to check out which movies we loved, and which ones we hated.

Oh and happy New Year!

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Here's this week's episode:

Unfortunately, after being jumped by The Council of Conspicuously-Robed Fish People, we lost the movie we were supposed to do this week. After fighting them off with a lamp post, a tire iron, and me shoving the Kim Kardashian Iron-Butt Cheeks Workout video down one of their throats (*shrugs I don't know it worked, though), we escaped. So we had to choose another one and ended up picking "Dr. Mordrid" (1992), instead of "Remo Williams."  By the way: who the hell is Dr. Mordrid? Tune-in to find out.

Also, we found that we were able to sit through the entire viewing of "The Keep" (1983), although not without a massive dose of disappointment. Ian Mc Kellan and Jurgen Prochnow are even in it. Basically, the Hitler Youth Group Rejects of Germany (Nazi's) descend upon a small random European village on a cliff, and demand to use their keep as a defense fortress. This is even after the Token Prophet of Doom tells them not to. What happens next? Big Meaty Demon with a rape-smile appears. Sounds interesting, right? That's what we thought, too. Then we instead started thinking: "What happened? What were they thinking when they made this movie? Is it possible to have a great set up and still fail that miserably?"

You get one more guess... Who is Dr. Mordrid?

It even LOOKS interesting doesn't it?

"Vait a minute, ve did not do vhis..."

"...OHMYGOD!!"

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Finally we got together and did the Musical Episode. Our two picks included "Cannibal The Musical," by a familiar duo who are now background celebrities, Matt Stone and Trey Parker. This one follows the story of a 19th century man who has been convicted of a crime made obvious by the title. He has to tell his story to someone who will listen (a bubbly reporter), so that he may in turn be absolved of said crime before he has to perform the neck dance at the gallows.

Next we have "Repo The Genetic Opera," which is my favorite of the two, because it's darker. This one stars Anthony Head and the talented and beautiful Sarah Brightman, with Paul Sorvino opposite them. It also has surprising appearances by Bill Mosely and Paris Hilton. Yes, you read that right. This one takes place in the not-too-distant dystopian future, where a large oligarchy (and I mean oligarchy with a capital O) farms and lends out genetically superior organs to the masses. These organs are necessary for survival because there had been an apocalyptic epidemic of organ failure at some point in time (probably from chemical warfare), and so thus, everyone must purchase or "rent" these organs. However, like the subprime mortgage crises in recent times, many people get stuck with bad deals of increasing monthly payments, and eventually, the piper starts to wonder where his pay went. That's when Paul Sorvino dispatches his "repo man" (buzzword) and assassin, bound by Faustian bargain contract, to get his property back. The story really takes a turn when he is stuck with a bargain he can't live with.

There's lots more to it, tune in to hear what we thought about both of these unusual brutal musicals.

Oh and for all you Saw-haters, it's produced by the producers OF Saw.

Tommy.

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Check it out, kiddos, it's the November Episode! We caught two sci-fi flicks, The Omega Man and Big Trouble in Little China.

Tune-in for the verdict.

*This trailer proves our Charleton Heston observations, perfectly.

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We are back after a loooooong hiatus. Its been a long wait but we've definitely got some exciting episodes on the way! For this one we decided to branch out and do a David Cronenburg film, "Videodrome" (1983), and also "House of the Devil" (2010). Cronenburg movies, I have learned, can only be ingested in small amounts, unless feeling your head explode as you try figure out what the hell is going on sounds like fun. That said, tune-in to see what we thought of this week's selection.

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Welcome back!

So here is the Ron Perlman Episode for this month's tribute episode and all that good stuff. Tune-in for our review of his performance in the movie "Cronos (1993)" as a nephew/lackey of an evil dying industrialist(?) obsessed with obtaining an artifact which is said to sustain life via its dark magickal properties. He finds competition with the hero of the movie, who is trying to figure out its workings as well, only to find that the price may end up being more horrible than he initially bargained for.

Then, of course we have the movie "Hellboy (2004)" of Ron Perlman fame, which probably does not need an introduction. All you need to know if you don't already, is that it contains: Thule Society Nazi's, Undying Ninja Nazi's, Rasputin, Demons named Samma-El, a psychic fishman, and an emo girl who can set stuff on fire. Sounds like fun. You should check it out.

Oh and both were apparently written and directed by a gentleman by the name of Guillermo Del Toro.

The Faceless Ones have Spoken! Therefore, thanks to the decision results on our Facebook Poll, the next episode will focus on a musical. But since this will most likely be horror or Sci-Fi/action musicals, rest-assured it's not going to suck. The rule is, in order to do a musical, there must be a body-count.

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Check it out, this is the episode where we review the grab bag picks from the last show.

The first part has us expressing our excitement over only "the best space-arena fighter movie ever made." And fittingly, of course, the name of the movie is "Arena" (1989). In this cheesy sci-fi fighting flick, its Man Vs Big-Footed Cybernetic Beasties. Watch as Feathery-Haired Man #23 takes on fighting a group of otherwise over-powering and deadly enhanced alien warriors to pay back money to a crimelord. Fish faces, four-armed men, double-crossing dames, and evil henchmen named Weezil are all packed into this interstellar extravaganza.

In the second part, we talk about the Troma release "Wizards of the Demon Sword" (1991). A muscle-bound and muscle-brained adventurer saves a woman who is the daughter of a sword-keeper, and the key to letting an evil wizard have his way with a legendary Demon Sword. And by have his way, I mean use it for swashbuckling. And by swashbuckling I mean sword-fighting. And...

So tube in to check out our scores for these obscure films, sure to have been summer blockbusters of the year if they had come out in 2011.

From someone's youtube channel, not a trailer, but gives a good idea of what the movie is about. By the way: who is the red-head in the bordello at 2:44?

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This week we are coming to you live with two movies for a noir episode. That's right, lots of spinning fans, general pseudo-coolness from middle-aged cops, and trench coats, and cigarettes, and... oh, more spinning fans! Watch the murder mystery of "Angel Heart," as a detective roams the deep south in search of a cold-blooded killer. It has Mickey Rourke before his facial reconfiguration, and Lisa Bonet (now Lilokai Moon, *shrugs) from "The Cosby Show," as she tried to branch out into more serious films. For her, it was a Faustian bargain for him... it was only Tuesday.

Then check out our review of Rutger Hauer on "Split-Second," where another middle-aged man (this time a caffeine and nicotine addicted cop), tries to chase down a feral serial killer in Generic Dystopian Town Number 22. Did we like it? Tune-in to hear the scores.

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As I continue my journey through what is available On Demand through comcast, I came across an oft forgotten fright flick from 1994: Wes Craven's New Nightmare

Short Take: Original Nightmare On Elm Street Heroine Heather Langenkamp is locked in mortal kombat with a very real evil entity who must get by her in order to enter our world in this original and often unsettling Wes Craven flick.

Who Should watch it: Wes Craven fans, people in the mood for something genuinely different, anyone who understands that this is not another Nightmare on Elm Street movie

The Plot:

We start off the story with an robo Freddy glove going on a rampage through a movie set, which of course turns out to be the nightmare of our main character, Heather Langenkamp. You see, New Nightmare takes place in reality. Yes indeedy, New Nightmare takes place in reality where most of the people in the story are playing themselves.

Heather is plagued by recurring nightmares of Freddy, along with a psychotic fan who reapeatedly calls her (oh the days before caller I.D, when every phone call was a mystery!). She is working on trying to become an established TV actress, but can't seem to get away from her Nightmare on Elm Street fame, and these new occurences certainly aren't helping. After meeting a head honcho from New Line Cinema along with Robert Englund, she discovers that Wes Craven is working on a new Freddy flick, despite Freddy being killed off in the previous installment. Heather starts figuring out in a hurry that all of this is having a very real effect on her life, especially her son played by Miko Hughes (or as you may remember him, the "boys have a penis and girls have a vagina" kid from Kindergarten Cop). Is Heather bonkers, or is the fictional movie dream demon actually crossing over into reality? You can probably guess. It turns out that the being accosting Heather is actually an ancient evil entity that takes different forms, and this time around, it has taken on Freddy's form

What I thought: It had been awhile since I had watched New Nightmare. I watched it first Jason (from over at the Movie Club Emporium) about ten years back, and I remember us both being pretty enamored with it.

Years later, I noticed more problems than I did originally, most notably the nearly two hour running time, coupled with the slow pacing which really hurts this flick. I would have been fine with it being nearly two hours, if only they had explored some of the other characters in the movie more. Heather and her son are the primary focus, and it works well for the most part, but the start retreading the same ground later on in the movie with these characters. I believe that the story would have worked better if Wes Craven and robert Englund's character's, and the phonomenon that was effecting them should have been explored further. We are given a brief idea of what this evil is, but some more info on it would have been nice.

Yet, this stands as an original horror flick with some solid acting, creepy scenes, and great visuals. Freddy is recognizable, but he looks quite different, more organic, more evil. The story is interesting, and a nice departure from the seemingly endless Nightmare on Elm Street sequels. The actors do a good job playing, well, themselves. Miko Hughes is passable for a child actor, though he does go over the top sometimes (he was like six years old,it's excusable).

This flick flopped when it came out, and it is easy to see why. I'm sure everyone was expecting another ninety minutes of wisecracks and cheesy freddy rap songs, and didn't quite know what to make of this much more cereberal horror flick.

Things to look out for:

John Saxon as himself, and then as Nancy's dad. Was it just me, or does John Saxon seem like he would be a cool guy to hang out with?

The kid in the park who rides by wearing a familiar looking striped sweater

Freddys clawed hand, which looks way more wicked than the original design.

Other people from the Nightmare franchise that are scattered throughout the film

Memorable Quotes: Robert Englund: [while walking Heather out of an interview] I think they'd like to see us together again. Heather Langenkamp: In what, a romantic comedy? Robert Englund: Just because it's a love story doesn't mean it can't have a decapitation or two

The WTF rewind moment: Despite some great special effects, the tongue coming out of the phone steals this category.

The Verdict:

New Nightmare is a really good horror flick that could've been one of the greats if it had just been handled a little bit better. There are some great scenes (Dylan touching god was great), and overall the movie is entertaining and generally well done, yet flawed. The pacing and the lack of really exploring the other characters are the real issues here. Despite all of my complaining (what can I say, I hate wasted potential), New Nightmare is a good little horror flick that is genuinely different. Just don't expect it to resemble the other Freddy flicks.

Nick: 3.5 out of 5.

Tommy: 3.5 out of 5.